Hey yo, I did some things but that's the old me!

For approximately the past 14 days, I have thrown caution to the wind; I have shut my inner voice off and set aside everything Charles has taught me. I have been eating like CRAZY… chocolate, burgers, ice cream… drinking coke, that delicious lemonade from the mall, you get the idea. I have gained 5 lbs… count them, 1…2…3…4…5 lbs!!! Yesterday I got back on my regiment as far as eating and today I got back in the pool. I knew what I was doing, I know the comfort I was looking for, but I just couldn’t stop myself. I refuse to go back to my old ways! In the past I would of let these 14 days dictate my course from here on out. No more! I know a lot of you have been on this same boat time and time again… we cannot let these feelings beat us!!! We are so much stronger then that. Mind over matter right? It’s easier said than done… but the important thing is that it can be done.

My friends and I switch our Sunday games from kickball to flag football… so much fun!!! But one of our best players already got injured… granted, he plays on the opposing team… but it still sucks to see him hurt =/.

We are thinking of starting our own little sports league… I’ll keep you guys posted!

=D

Who is Wonder Woman?

My friends Ani & Jesus are HUGE Wonder Woman fans... She wrote this cool little article about what WW means to her... check it out!

Who is Wonder Woman? A question that took me 28 years to learn….

Wonder Woman, Love and Murder (comic book series): Questions like: “Who am I?”
How come the one thing that should be obvious to all of us is the one thing we spend our entire lives trying to figure out?

It’s a question I once asked myself. It started with a book my uncle lent me to read, in the book Wonder Woman forgets she’s WW (ironic you may think). Shortly after the book my uncle gave me a Wonder Woman doll for my 28th birthday. I will never forget the words he whispered, I give you this doll because one day you will realize that you are Wonder Woman. For 28 years I had forgotten or may I say I never realized that the person I was looking at in the mirror was WW and though the mirror still gets foggy I try to remember to wipe it and look at the Amazon that stands before it. It was William Moulton, Wonder Woman’s writer and creator that saw through the hearts of women, not only because he was emotionally intelligent but spiritually intelligent (as my friend Caro would say). Then came a writer like Jodi Picoult who showed us that WW is not a God but a person that makes mistakes, that reacts and sometimes feels lost but faces adversity and realizes that what she thought was right at that time may not be right now. But most of all realizes that mistakes are a fact of life and it is the response to error that counts (in the words of Nikki Giovanni). In simplest terms she is wise because she realizes that she has much to learn and can turn a wound into wisdom (as Oprah said), intelligent because she knows she cannot change others, for change is within herself, strong because she’s able to make those changes and see herself for exactly the person she is and love herself regardless. She is honest with others and honest with herself, brave, because she stands for what she believes in and a hero because she inspires others by just being who she is. Wonder Woman is much more than just a comic book character, she is a
super-hero that believes in “liberty and freedom for all women kind“. WW is within all of us, most find it too difficult to let her out but as my hero once said, we become the majority because it’s easier than being the minority.

I started writing this article because in truth I was tired of the idea most people had of Wonder Woman and I wanted to educate them. As I finished the article I realized that what I really want to do is inspire women. As Gloria Steinem once wrote, “perhaps that’s the appeal of Wonder Woman.” It’s not only a child’s need for a lost independence, but an adult’s need for a lost balance between women and men, between humans and nature. However simplified, that is Wonder Woman’s message: Remember Our Power Sisters.

Here's looking at you, kid!

I’ve never been a mushy girl, affectionate on occasions yes, but never mushy. I’m not one to go around hugging people or telling just anyone that I love them. I think the people closest to me can attest to the fact that I show my affection mostly through actions and not words. Lately I have been working on that and once in a while I will verbalize my feelings for others. So, y’all know how much I love my brother and how special he is to me, even though in the past he has thought I didn’t like him much, it wasn’t the truth. Growing up I was always annoyed by him as a big sister usually is, then when I was in my late teens and he was in his early teens, I inevitably became a parental figure… that responsibility was thrust upon me, not by any malicious acts on behalf of my mother, it’s just the way things worked out. I found myself taking care of situations and issues that weren’t mine to take care of, and eventually those things hardened me up. I have to admit I am not very proud of the way I used to treat and talk to people (especially those nearest to my heart). But somehow they always remained at my side and supported me through all my endeavors. I guess in a way they always knew that I was hard on them because I love them so much. Still... it doesn’t excuse my behavior, and for that I have apologized to every single one of them. I’ve since turned to comedy when things get too mushy and real, but I figure its better then just shutting people down when they are being sincere. Sometimes I feel like an apology hasn’t been enough and feel guilty all over again… then people do things for me that make me understand what real love is. When someone can over look all your bad traits and still love you the way my family and true friends love me, then it makes me realize that there might be something to this greatness everyone keeps talking about.

That being said, I have always without a doubt or hesitation been willing to give my life for my brother, through the good and the bad. I think part of that hard attitude was my way of protecting him from the world. So you can understand why him going off to war was such a hard thing for me to deal with. It’s hard for all military families, really. Believe me, I have three soldiers in mine! I guess for me it stemmed from that need to keep him safe. You see, it’s always just been the three of us (my mom, my brother and I), so I am very protective of them. (Don’t even get me started on when he would bring some new trollop all up in my house!) This is why I am so touched every time you guys write to me to tell me that my brother, as well as all the other soldiers in his platoon, are in your prayers. I’ve said this before and I will say it again, no matter what your views on this senseless war are, no matter if you are a republican, a democrat, a liberal or if you don’t give a flying raccoon’s ass about any political issue, you must respect what these men and women are doing. They are fighting for something they believe in (most of them anyway), they do it with pride and with their head held high and that is very respectable. Volunteering to join the military at a time of war takes a lot of courage! Point blank!

This is one of the things that motivated me to finally go through with fulfilling my dream of finishing a triathlon. And now thanks to my little brother (he paid for my registration) I will do it on October 18th, 2009. He sent me the following message yesterday after I was registered:

“This is cake for you, Caro. All you have to do is make the person in front of you your finish line, then once you have passed them you do the same with the others until you finish! This is nothing for you!!!”

That is all the motivation I need to own this bitch! I have a great training partner and all the support a girl could wish for. So here I go guys, 137 days ‘till T-day!!!

I'll have a new post up today...

Wait for it... waaaaaiiit for it...

Chill bitches, its coming! <3

Me? A reality show? Is it gonna be humiliating? Fine, where do I sign up?

So, by now a lot of you have seen my episode of SYL, heck I even got recognized at Wal-Mart, HE-EY! All joking aside I must admit this has been a whirlwind experience… I had a small group of family and friends over to watch the premier of my episode and it was so much fun! We laughed, we cried and then we hugged it out, bitch! But let me tell you about a couple of things you didn’t get to see on TV!

Since I have a couple of points I want to talk to you about… I am making this behind the scenes blog a multi entry type of deal, here’s the first part.

#1 THE INTERVENTION!
First of all… who goes “candy shopping”??? I love how Charles goes “I happen to know that Caro and her mom will be candy shopping today”. What? When have I ever done that? Seriously, it’s hilarious! What really happened was that my mother was aware of the fact that I had been cast on the show and with the help of the lovely Geraldine (one of the associate producers of the show) she came up with this elaborate scheme to get me over to the Fresh Market where we were allegedly “candy shopping”.

My intervention was on a Friday, the Wednesday prior to that my mom got a call from Geraldine telling her I had been cast and that she would be coming by later on that day, hopefully when I wasn’t around, to go over some details. I was downstairs when my mother got the phone call, so when I came upstairs I noticed my Ma was looking at me with that doe eyed I’m-so-proud-of-you look only a mother can give you (clue #1), so instantly I was like… “What’s wrong?!”. Since I was scheduled to have a meeting with the executive producers of SYL that coming Friday, she told me she just had a feeling everything was gonna go great for me. Mhmm.

Come Friday morning I wake up bright eyed and bushy tailed for my supposed interview with the executive producers of the show. I take my time getting ready, too. I washed my hair, put on my make up and picked out the right clothes, all the while being surrounded by cute animated woodland creatures and the slight hint of Ariel’s voice singing in the back ground (the melody she sings when Ursula is taking away her voice, not the one about the "treasures" in her "cavern"). Then, 90 minutes before my meeting, I get a phone call from my cousin Dianna… her car broke down while she was getting some stuff for her boss and she needed to get back to the hospital immediately. I called my uncles, my cousin; even my aunt and they were all “busy”. Hell, my aunt didn’t even bother to answer, so it was once again up to me to come to the rescue! I was PISSED! Instantly my bright Disney-esque morning started gathering clouds in the horizon. My mom offered to come with me so I would clam down. As I was walking out the door my Grandma goes… “Why don’t you wear something other than those flip-flops?” (clue #2). I said bye and shut the door.

I waited in the car for about 5 minutes and started honking the horn for my mother to hurry up, she came down with a back pack and when I asked her what the hell that was for she couldn’t give me a straight answer (clue #3), I was so frustrated I didn’t even care at that point. The whole drive from my house to Aventura I was bitching about how people only call me when they need me, how today was an important day for me, how I better not be late or they will ALL have hell to pay, etc… then I remembered that the week before Dianna had been in a minor car accident and she had a rental… why wasn’t the rental company picking her up and resolving this issue, this made me even more frustrated! About halfway there, my phone rings and it turned out to be my brother, I was so happy to hear from him that my mood instantly lit up. I noticed my mom was being kind of cryptic… I guess she wanted to tell him but obviously couldn’t and since we didn’t know when we would hear from him again… it was a bitter sweet moment for her. As soon as my Ma hangs up my cell, my aunt calls me and says… “Hey, don’t forget to put on some lipstick.” (Clue #4) That was the least of my worries at that point.

We finally make it to the Fresh Market and my mother’s cell rings; it was “Dianna” telling her to come inside for a bite to eat. Um… wasn’t this bitch in a rush? We get inside and my mother starts wondering aimlessly around the store, as if this was her first time off the farm and into the big city… so I kept walking behind her saying things like, “MA! What is wrong with you? Now is not the time!” all while scoping the store for Dianna. Once I went around the third time I called her and this is how the conversation went down:

Dianna: Hello?
Caro: Dude, where the “F” are you?
Dianna: (Silence)
Caro: HELLLLOOOO?
Dianna: Uh… where are you?
Caro: I’m in the store… Where are YOU?
Dianna: By the pharmacy (CLICK)

Yes, that trollop just went ahead and hung up on me! There is no Pharmacy at Fresh Market (Clue #5), so I went to the cashier and asked where there was a pharmacy in that shopping center, she looked at me like I was crazy. At this point my mom had made her way to the candy section of the store. I saw her from where I was standing, which was by the front door, so I started gesturing for us to leave and she just stood there by a girl with a sample tray full of candy. As if she had NEVER in her life seen free candy… it was so odd. She kept waving for me to come over while I kept madly gesturing NO! This exchange continued for about a minute until I finally went over. I stood there looking at her and said hi to the candy girl (who turned out to be Geraldine), then my mom goes “Coje” which means “take some” in Spanish... the funny thing is you can actually hear her saying it on the show!!! So I finally gave in and took a candy sample and that’s when Charles and the crew ambushed me.

I have to tell you, it was such an overwhelming moment! Not only did I know this was one of those moments where your life is about to change, and I mean really change, because we are constantly changing and evolving, but those are very subtle changes. This was one of these life altering moments, a moment where I knew there was going to be a before and an after, so while Charles was talking… I was playing back everything that had happened that morning, the whole sequence of events that had taken place in order for me to end up at that store, and at that moment I felt something I had never felt before, overwhelming love. I realized how elaborate the plan had been, how they were all in on it and how they each did their part to make sure I was surprised. How my Ma had to put so many pieces into play in order to fool me, which isn’t an easy task. How she had probably called my cousin Jules to get my best friend Jesus’ number so he could tell her where that Fresh Market was. How Jesus’ had called his niece (and my friend) Ani so she could give my Ma the directions, because Ani’s just better at that (that’s something Jesus would say). How Dianna had to think on her feet, even though I probably made her nervous. How my Grandmother wanted me to wear nicer shoes, so I would look my best. How my aunt didn’t want me to look pale on T.V., just in case the love of my life happened to watch the show. But most importantly, how had he called 20 minutes earlier, my Ma would’ve been able to share our joy with my brother.

So, yes for those of you who have written to me and told me how genuine my reaction seemed… it’s because it was! I was so surprised. I never thought I would be caught off guard… they all did a great job. I get teary eyed remembering it. Such an amazing moment in my life!!!

Next blog: #2 The “TWAlet” paper debacle of 2008. Patsy, Jesus and I gorge on candy.

I want to save your life, Caro!

Check back later today for my episode review!

Wakey, wakey, eggs and bakey!

One of the hardest things for me my ENTIRE life has been waking up early. It is like torture! When I was a kid every morning was like one of those UFC fights with my mom when she came into my room letting me know it was time for school. Tears were shed, hair was pulled, asses were whooped… every… morning! She would make me go to sleep extra early so that I would be “ready” to wake up on time, she gave me chamomile before bed so I would be well rested and relaxed in the morning, and she would take us to parks after school so we could get so exhausted we would pass out early thus waking up eager… nothing worked. One day she took me to this new age flower child therapist friend of hers and the woman said that maybe at birth I had been pulled from the comfort of my mother’s womb too soon or traumatically and THAT’S why waking up is sooo hard. Yeah. I don’t know. I’m almost 30 now (eeek) and I still have a hate/hate relationship with my alarm clock. I spoke to a doctor recently and she told me it takes 21 days to break a habit. In 21 days the body no longer needs that habit, so the mind starts to discard it from its thought process. Sounds interesting, right? My logic is... if in 21 days you get rid of an old habit, then you form a new (hopefully better) one to replace it. So what I need to do is FORM a new habit. Well, I am willing to give it a try. Starting tomorrow I am going to start my 21 days of waking up at 5:30 a.m. so I can go to the gym before work, the way I’m supposed to. Let’s see if this lasts longer then the time I tried to do the master cleanse… I got four hours into it and then just poured that devil juice down the drain! Wish me luck!